New Moon | July 17, 2023 | 24 Cancer 56’
And stand together yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow. —Kahlil Gibran
I read the email from my sister and my feelings were hurt. It did not register as hurt at first. It registered as resentment. I immediately called it a power struggle because the transiting Moon was 29 Aries square transiting Pluto at 29 Capricorn right as I was reading it.
The words I would put on my feelings were, “Why are you messing around in my territory here? Are you saying I’m not handling it, doing it good enough or fast enough?”
We had a scheduled talk in the evening. I questioned her. We had a huffy exchange. The matter was in the open, but unresolved.
The next day I wrote to her in my journal, “The reason I struggle with you is that I have deep love and respect for you, and I want to get stuff right because I seek to be in your high regard.” That was a bit of clarity for me.
I realized that when we have friction with someone; hurt that turns to anger, that friction feels like "all bad." We don’t tell ourselves that we are having a misunderstanding, or a healthy difference that is not going to break us down or tear us apart. There does not have to be a victor and a vanquished.
Let’s also call friction resistance. Resistance is confrontation, fight, struggle, conflict. Friction is a contact sport. Hence the Kahil Gibran quote, “ . . . Stand together, yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart. My morning meditation focused on tarot key 6—The Lovers. This key depicts the man and woman together, but apart.
I knew I was out of balance at the time, so I drew a Tarot Key from another deck. Again, I pulled The Lovers. The Kahil Gibran quote comes from the poem, “On Marriage,” and my sister and I have a seventh house relationship, one of partnership. We partner in many ways—Lunations is just one of them. And sometimes, though rarely, we have editorial disputes.” Mostly we jump up and down at the delights of our collaboration.
When you are not engaged in resistance, you are keeping a respectable, objective distance, like the pillars of the temple.
I could also hear Abraham-Hicks saying that the best relationships are not with people who never question us. We need contrast in relationships to be authentic and provide checks and balances with our loved ones.
The Lovers key also stands for the relationship between the three levels of consciousness that exist within an individual or a situation.
The next day I emailed an apology, recognizing that I was reacting out of sorts. Her response was, “And it pays for me to notice when I have anxiety tinged with guilt.” This was revealing. We were both having our own internal wrestling matches. It could be that I felt the angst that was behind her email, for which my angst was a match.
Not all power struggles are bad. Power struggles need not end up with a winner and a loser. Power struggles can teach us how to manage our sovereignty.
The nodes change signs today. The North Node is 29 Aries, and the South Node is 29 Libra. The North Node is where that Moon was.
I think we can call this upcoming 18 months of North Node in Aries, “about sovereignty,” which will sometimes mean we are a little combative, and sometimes it will look like a quest for independence or autonomy. This is the Aries North Node. The Libra South Node warns against being wishy-washy or infirm about our position. Astrologer Isabel Hickey says of these nodes, before you give yourself away, you have to have a self to give.
Feelings, province of Cancer and sign of family matters and patterns, can benefit from being raised to the conscious level, beyond automatic reaction. What is this that I feel? Why do I feel bad? Feelings can, with some practice, be neutralized by a pause. No judgement. This enables you to rise above a thing and escape the swing. Feeling reactive? The matter is probably not as you are judging it, especially if your reaction is negative. Pause. Know that you are safe, and let yourself be lifted above and between, like the healing angel in The Lovers key.