Full Moon | February 27, 2021 | 8 Virgo 57’
Perfect just as I am today. I am somebody; unique and special. I was made and the mold was broken. No other human being on the planet can do what I am meant to do.
It is possible I do not know that? It is possible that I look at myself and say, not yet. You are not ready yet. You are not enough yet. This may be Virgo in tension with Saturn in Aquarius and Chiron in Aries. It does not matter what the people say or do not say. It does not matter that my genius may be hidden in plain sight. If my esteem is derived from the people. The people can decide that I am no longer worthy. However, if I am the integrated holder of my self-esteem, then it shall not be bruised or tarnished by whether or not it is noticed or noted.
In what condition is your mission? Moon in Virgo conjunct the asteroid Vesta in Virgo are alone in the right hemisphere with The Sun on the Pisces ascendant. Vesta says, let not the flame die out. Keep hope alive. Keep true to yourself though all might doubt you and claim to find you wanting.
I recently listened to a YouTube video played as part of my morning Rise and Write group by Alain de Bolton called “Why is an ordinary life no longer good enough?” He says that the first question people ask when they meet you for the first time is, “What do you do, meaning what job do you have and what kind of powers of financial accumulation do you have?” Jobs are represented by Virgo.
Makes me think of Saturn in Aquarius square Uranus in Taurus. Makes me think of the oft stated plight–I can’t take flight because I have bills to pay. I can’t have fun when there's so much work to do. It is better to reprise and repeat than take a chance. Better to follow the tried and the true even if that's trying and untrue for me.
Can we embrace the idea that we are fine as we are and let go of the struggle for merit or agreement? Perhaps most of us do not realize that we are so engaged. I did not know until I was told to relax. I already am a person with extraordinary worth as far as the universe is concerned. I have nothing to do, no position or height to attain. I am good now. I am not just okay. I am extraordinary beyond compare and beyond my own ignorance regarding same. I did not know that I was trying to make something of myself and not accepting myself as long as I had not made it.
What a fine turn of events it was to accept that I have nothing to prove. What a relief! I am done. I do not have to climb. I do not have to try to achieve because my esteem would be determined by it. This freedom has so settled in my bones, when looking back to see the turning point, I have to squint.
This knowledge has not made me complacent or careless. It has not kept me from being and doing my best and letting that be its own reward.
Martin Luther King said that “We must make full and constructive use of the freedom we already possess.” This also sounds like Saturn square Uranus. Often on the Saturn side of things we argue for our limitations. We make excuses. We make our movement forward dependent upon someone else’s actions. Our limitations are ours to overcome. We have the freedom to do that.
PRACTICUM
Observe the speech of your thought. Are you arguing for your limitations? Are you saying yes, but? Are you waiting for the world to change, waiting for the rescue? You have the freedom to change it. Take something that is vexing you and change the way you are setting it up. Example: Feeling cribbed, cabined, and confined due to the pandemic might really indicate that you determine outside conditions as having power over you and negate your own creative potency.
“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” – Anais Nin